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View Full Version : RapidReboot(tm) Technology Revealed


knightfoo
2005-04-01, 11:50 AM
Nearly 2 years ago ServerBeach announced a revolutionary new tool for dedicated server customers: RapidReboot(tm), the first datacenter-wide customer reboot control solution. Customers and competitors alike have wracked their brains since the release of the RapidReboot(tm) technology, trying to figure out just how the technology works so well and still be competitively priced in the discount market. As of today, no one has any success in cracking the secret of RapidReboot(tm).

Many providers have released their own reboot systems, but there is always a catch: you have pay for it, only certain customers can use it, it only works between the hours of 9-5 M-F, etc. Not RapidReboot. All customers in all datacenters can use RapidReboot 365/24. Since RapidReboot(tm) has been public for two years, and we are confident that no one could duplicate the technology even if they knew what it was, here it is: DC Monkeys.

What is a DC Monkey? A Rhesus monkey which is specially trained to quickly identify servers that need to be rebooted and get to them in a matter of seconds, regardless of datacenter location. After many years of studying datacenter operations, we found that the most time-consuming part of a server reboot was locating and getting to the server. Long rows of contiguous racks and servers nearly identical in appearance make it difficult for humans to easily navigate and find servers. However, Rhesus monkeys are much more agile and can cope with "forests" of racks, easily leaping over and swinging around rack poles to reach remote servers.

The monkeys are trained to locate servers in two stages. First, they are shown a map of the datacenter with the rack affected highlighted. Since the monkeys are normally above the racks, its very natural for them to utilize this "look down" of the datacenter to find the rack location. In the second stage, they are shown a representation of a rack with the relative locations of the servers in need of a reboot highlighted (picture attached). A fully-trained monkey can identify a rack and server location in under 2 seconds. After identification, it only takes about 5 seconds for the monkey to reach the rack and toggle the power switch on the proper server. This is about as much time as it takes for a browser page to reload .. nearly instant!

A datacenter with 5,000 servers can be handled by a team of 12-16 monkeys, even on a very busy day. They work on rotating shifts with plenty of resting time between reboot shifts. Rhesus monkeys are very mellow and not easily distracted, which makes them ideal for this sort of work. Each datacenter has a jungle atrium built-in to allow the monkeys some "time in the wild". Even though we have a flawless safety record to date, we have on-site zoologists and doctors just in case.

How cost-effective is this solution? Very! Even with a team of 12 monkeys in every datacenter, and the costs associated with caring for them, the cost per server is only $10 per month. This allows us to provide the technology to all of our customers at no cost and still maintain a healthy profit margin.

GaryK
2005-04-01, 12:12 PM
Do they work for bananas? Or have the little buggers unionized and started demanding things like a real salary and other irrational things?

Where's that monkey smiley when you need it? :lmao:

knightfoo
2005-04-01, 12:26 PM
Do they work for bananas? Or have the little buggers unionized and started demanding things like a real salary and other irrational things?

Where's that monkey smiley when you need it? :lmao:

Rhesus Pieces. :D

-knightfoo

GaryK
2005-04-01, 12:30 PM
I'll bet you were dying with anticipation over being able to use that line.
:poke:

QT
2005-04-01, 12:36 PM
Hahahaha! I needed that. How clever.... :P

GaryO
2005-04-01, 20:01 PM
LMMFAO...that is great!

adb22791
2005-04-01, 20:03 PM
do the monkeys ever make mistakes...?

knightfoo
2005-04-01, 20:13 PM
do the monkeys ever make mistakes...?

Very rarely. We track this very carefully and have found that there is an average of one "misboot" for every 2,000 reboot requests. The misboot rate is slightly higher during the spring months for some reason.

-knightfoo

adb22791
2005-04-01, 22:12 PM
Very rarely. We track this very carefully and have found that there is an average of one "misboot" for every 2,000 reboot requests. The misboot rate is slightly higher during the spring months for some reason.

-knightfoo

perhaps the monkeys are more excitable?
So thats what those pipes on the data center ceiling were... monkey transportation!!! :laughing:

Nathan D.
2005-04-24, 21:28 PM
Rhesus Pieces. :D

-knightfoo
Genius! lol...That got a good laugh out of me.

Infopro
2005-05-06, 07:50 AM
Be careful here, that picture shows him wearing no protective gear. PITA gets a hold of this there'll be trouble I bet. :rofl: